IT'S THE million dollar question - what do women really want?
This is something which I have observed among family, friends and sisters.
Everything written in this article is with respect to a woman.
1. An automatic fat elimination process in the body.
If scientists can discover superbugs and name them after good old Delhi, they can surely find the bug that can automatically eliminate all the fat the moment she bites into a burger with extra cheese.
2. Husbands to be a little more appreciative of their cooking.
Please grow up guys, not everyone can cook like your mom - she has spent 40 years in the kitchen. Can't you give ur ladies some more time?
3. A maid with a silencer attached.
Available 24x7, this wonder maid should keep her mouth shut and work for nothing. This is what men call a wife. It is amazing how all the Ramu kaka s in movies are so obedient and pampering - too bad they don't exist in real life.
4. A man.
It is not too difficult to get one - but if you want one with the following features, you may have to look for him on another galaxy. He should love you like you are the last woman in the universe. He should multitask, be amazing in bed and know exactly what we want.
They should be there only when the ladies need them because they can't stop nagging at times.
5. Not to be asked 'Where's my wallet/ glasses/ car keys/ handkerchief?' every single morning by the other half.
It is because of things like these that women sometimes wish they had a punching bag! Can men ever learn to take care of their precious belongings (no puns intended)?
6. Zero-calorie versions of hot chocolate fudge, chocolate truffle cake, and everything else in chocolate.
They'd love to live on pure junk food - potato chips, cheesy pizzas, fried chicken - on a regular basis without feeling guilty about it.
7. Holidays that give them the chance to read just one book, without being interrupted with 'I am HUNGRY, Mom?' or 'I am BORED' every few minutes.
8. A body of their choice.
It could be Angelina Jolie's one month or J Lo's the next, depending on the kind of look they take a fancy to.
9. A long, hot bath with a glass of wine and aromatic candles all around and a scenic view from the bathroom.
No one knocking at the bathroom door, no barging in.
10. A decent home-cooked dinner prepared by their better halves.
When they are too exhausted to cook, men should chip in and prepare a meal for them and clean up the kitchen for a change. Note: Maggi is excluded from the list.
11. To be able to admire the dishy buttocks and the smooth skin of a younger man without feeling terrified when she realises that she could be old enough to be his mother.
Just appreciating a hot bod doesn't mean that they are cougars.
12. No backseat driving please.
They love the idea of long drives but constant criticism of their driving skills really puts them off. If men have a problem with their driving, why can't they get them a dishy chauffeur or a car that drives by itself. Women can drive and that's the reason why the government decided to give them a driver's license.
13. No backbiting, tutting or arched eyebrows from male colleagues when they have to dash off from work to pick up a sick child.
It is a genuine problem, they would never go out shopping on the pretext of our child falling sick.
14. One fruitful, decent conversation with their husbands at least once a day.
Communication is the key to a successful relationship but competing with the latest man gadget - whether an iPhone or iPad – really gets on one's nerves.
15. To go out on the roads of Delhi and know they won't be stared at or eve-teased or mugged; to talk to the bankers without being asked 'Can we talk to your husband?'.
It is a man's world, (I think they agree…. ;)) but people should consider the fact that they might, just might, bring in half the household income, if not more. They do wish at times that they are spoken eye to eye rather than eye to breast.
16. Meaningful, loving sex, with a long, endless foreplay, preceded and followed by candlelight conversations, cuddles, chocolates and kisses.
It sounds cliched but women love cliches and have all the right to get a little selfish in bed once in a while. PS: A quickie will do only if she has to get up earlier than usual.
17. Endearing and well-thought out surprises.
Women love surprises and it is high time men understood this. They don't want diamond rings. An empty laundry basket, a bottle of that Sauvignon Blanc, possession of the TV remote for a whole evening, and a day to be spent exactly as they wish - just once in a blue moon.
18. A wardrobe that refreshes itself after every six months.
Who wants to wear something that is oh-so-last-season?. True. Everyone wants new clothes that can suit every occasion. But on the contrary they end up with a pile of not just last season’s clothes, but last decade's. It makes them feel dull as dishwater.
19. Good obedient children who are loving and appreciative, who don't treat their mothers as slaves. Can't children go to bed with a smile on their faces rather than crying at the injustice of their mothers? These ladies've read 100 parenting books, for goodness sake. None of them seem to be working on their children.
20. Bras that fit.
I wonder why it is so difficult for them to get bras that are of the right size. Fancy, lacy, sexy bras that lift their cleavage and their moods would do wonders for sure. They hate it when someone points out bra straps peeping out of our sleeves.
21. Unlimited free local and international calls and a cell phone that upgrades itself every six months.
Women TALK and who wouldn't want to talk in style. But the exorbitant bills are a pain in the neck.
22. A high paying, stress-free, enjoyable and a satisfying job that needs the least amount of work.
One can go off on vacations every two weeks. And of course, they should be the boss.
23. A bed meant for a princess/ queen and for a change readied by the man of the house.
Huge fluffed-up pillows and a luxurious duvet that is changed regularly. Have men wondered why these ladies don't want to spend time in bed?
24. Silver and bronze artefacts that never go dull... never a layer of dust anywhere, even after a dust storm. And white linen, upholstery and tapestry that never get dirty.
25. A day at the spa.
They need at least one day in a month at the spa, getting pampered without worrying about the fat bill we have to pay at the end of the day.
26. Lifelong supply of matching footwear, bags and watches.
It is a headache to get accessories that go with all their dresses. Wouldn't it be great if their accessories changed colours according to the dresses their wear.
27. A Saturday night out dining with friends or at the movies rather than ending up watching television at home because the husband is busy at work. That would be the perfect way to end the week.
28. Jam free/clutter-free roads where they can drive without hearing swear words being used freely. Or else, be prepared for them to retort in similar fashion.
29. Pay their bills whenever they want to.
They hate being bugged by banks, and mobile phone service providers. They know that they have to pay their bills and they are not running away with your money. I wonder why these people don't go after the guys who give fake addresses and don't pay their bills regularly. These ladies are law abiding women and they will give them their money when they have it.
30. A clean home.
When a woman goes out for the day and leaves her husband in charge of the kids, she does not want to come back and see the children hungry and awake, tomato ketchup stains on the bed and messy bottles in the kitchen (including beer bottles). She wants the tables cleared of dirty dishes and no piles of dirty clothes on the floor.
A woman can always dream, can't she?
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
What Men really want.... ?
RATHER HEDONISTIC, but certainly simpler compared to a woman's demands.
That's how the men's list of wants turned out which I have observed in my friends, family, siblings.....
Here they are, but not in any order of importance:
1. Money, money, money. Put '10 crore or so in his account and never hassle him with tax issues - and voila, you have one happy man. Sure, it should all be in white. Men love the colour of money and they love it even more when it is white. Enough money to support all our frivolous expenditure, savings, EMIs and investments.
2. Six- pack, eight- pack, whatever.
These may be trends set by our Bollywood pin- up boys, but if they can do it why can't their fans? So men now want to pack some muscles into their abdomen. Six or eight - anything would work for me (I'm trying not to sound too fastidious). However, some men wish they could be proud of their tyres. We call it single pack, a sign of prosperity.
And women do like rich men... yet being fat isn't such a good idea.... Sigh..!!!.
3. Women who don't expect us to be mind readers. They don't want silicon goddesses, or size- zero babes with the sex appeal of stick insects. But they wish women could be more direct in communicating. They must specify if they just want to be listened to or they seek advice. Tell us what's wrong... or what you want and don't rely on telepathy to do it. Also, don't drag other issues into an argument... stick to the problem at hand.
4. A girl who can read our minds. When were men ever fair? They may not want to read a woman's mind, but they do want women to read what's on theirs.
Even if it means that they end up sounding a little like women. A woman with great telepathic skills - that's what they want. Yes, a woman who can guess what's on my mind would be great. We too want to be showered with compliments - not daily, but say once a month.
5. Maturity . Women grow up faster than men, experts say.
But men feel women should be more mature. They all seem to be giggly girls trapped in women's bodies. But if they are so mature, why don't they know how to react when a man is angry? Men want to play the angry young man and be left alone at times.
6. S. E. X. All things in life for a man revolve around the three- letter- word.
We agree that men can't think beyond their pants. They think about it 25 hours a day. It is on top of every man's mind, heart, body and soul.
They also would love to have good- looking girls at their workplace. There should be some eye- candy, especially in our team, so that we have someone to talk about while having a smoke.
7. S- P- A- C- E. It is sacred for them. They need it and crave for it badly. We need a room of our own, where we can lock ourselves up and not be bothered even if the world falls apart. It would be a dream- cometrue for a man to find a woman, who gives them that space.
8. Drink without snobbery.
Chuck taking in the aroma of wines and Scotch - this snobbery won't lead you anywhere. We sometimes drink just to get sloshed, rather than enjoy the oaky smell of Scotch. Yes, even if wine snobbery is a great way to impress women.
9. A job that pays us to go on vacation. All of them seem to be big on adventure sport, even if they chicken out on a roller coaster ride.
Trekking trips and adventure treks, all paid for.
Besides, providing that much- needed thrill in a man's life, they give us the break we want from the saas- bahu soap operas. On screen and sometimes in real life.
10. Night out with the guys. At least once week, a stag night- out because they don't want their world to always revolve around the women in their lives. Guys can have great fun together and that too with no strings attached.
11. Shopping is a pain at times.
It's boring if you have to stay in one single shop for hours. It is quite painful when your mother/ sister/ wife/ girlfriend cannot decide on what she wants to buy.
12. To be the life of a party. So what if they can't move their bodies like Michael Jackson or a John Travolta. So what if they are good only at a bad bhangra or a saphera dance? Your man loves the idea of grabbing all the attention at a party and is proud of his dance moves even if they make you wince. Sure, women love to attract attention at a party too, but they are a little more mature about it... ahem!
13. To be the alpha male at work/ home. We evolved from apes. Call it animal instincts but men crave to be the alpha male, especially at work, with bosses scared of them and women co- workers swooning all over them. And getting paid for even insubstantial work.
14. Condoms. A super- saver, mega economy pack of condoms.
It is a terrible idea to scout for condoms in the middle of the night. A lifetime supply of condoms wouldn't be bad at all.
15. Jacuzzi + Sauna. A luxurious bath in a jacuzzi, a glass of beer and a sexy woman at one's side. Really, did women say that they like to spend hours by themselves in the bath? Maybe something can be worked out.
16. To be treated like babies.
We are always pampering the women in our life. Except our mother, no one else pampers us that much. Sometimes we also want to be the baby in the relationship.
17. Sunday afternoon drinking.
A glass of chilled vodka with lime cordial would make for a perfect Sunday afternoon. Of course one shouldn't be howled at for doing the same. We just want to relax on a Sunday afternoon.
18. Easy hair removal procedures . Not having to get up each morning and shave. Yes, men do discuss hair removal creams and waxing. I am a hairy man. But instead of worrying about ways to get rid of body hair, I wish women would be more appreciative of out natural fur coat.
If Julia Roberts could show off her hairy armpits, why can't men?
19. Buffer stock of boxer shorts and underwears. The last thing men want to do is to shop for underwear.
It's boring. So a never- ending supply of boxer shorts would work for me.
20. Party every month . They want one big party a month without worrying about dropping drunk friends home or cleaning up the vomit on the carpet.
21. To be street smart. Whether they are street smart or not, men want to be known for their streetsmartness.
People should get the impression that we have the solution for everything.
22. Gizmos, gadgets, mean machines. A car that would make heads turn. A smart phone with unlimited data connection, GPS and turn- by- turn navigation ( men don't like asking for directions) along with an organiser and reminders that can jolt you from slumber. A giant screen high definition TV and hi- fi music system with digital data connection. Of course everything should be affordable.
23. An excellent couch. Remember Joey and Chandler in Friends ? How they spent hours sitting on their lazy boy chairs drinking beer and watching Baywatch ? Well, it seems to be a man's ultimate fantasy to have a multi- purpose comfortable couch on which they can do all sorts of things.
24. People who drive in their lanes. What does it take to get some traffic sense into some people?. They want people to drive in their lanes and obviously non- bumpy roads with no traffic. And yes, the traffic cops should treat us like royalty.
25. No alarm clocks. We are lazy, they admit. Alarm clocks should be completely banned. And women - mothers, sisters, wives should understand the importance of five more minutes of sleep.
26. Food, food, food and more food.
True, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. We don't expect our better-halves to cook like our mothers, all we want is for them to learn the basics of good cooking and we are ready to help them in the kitchen.
27. Dhishoom dhishoom. They want to be able to pick up a guy and throw him like a soft ball, and impress the audience.
One must learn to defend oneself, take up krav maga maybe.
28. A surprise bonus/ promotion/ hike. Once in a while, men would look forward to some surprise perks. Recession is over... so there's no excuse, they say.
29. No bills. They don't want to be bothered with bills. Once in a while, banks could waive off credit cards, bills and EMIs. We'll pay our utility bills, though
30. Corrupt politicians caught in sting operation. Men like talking about big things like politics and governance. We love watching politician caught in a sting operation. Well, a man can always dream...can't he!
That's how the men's list of wants turned out which I have observed in my friends, family, siblings.....
Here they are, but not in any order of importance:
1. Money, money, money. Put '10 crore or so in his account and never hassle him with tax issues - and voila, you have one happy man. Sure, it should all be in white. Men love the colour of money and they love it even more when it is white. Enough money to support all our frivolous expenditure, savings, EMIs and investments.
2. Six- pack, eight- pack, whatever.
These may be trends set by our Bollywood pin- up boys, but if they can do it why can't their fans? So men now want to pack some muscles into their abdomen. Six or eight - anything would work for me (I'm trying not to sound too fastidious). However, some men wish they could be proud of their tyres. We call it single pack, a sign of prosperity.
And women do like rich men... yet being fat isn't such a good idea.... Sigh..!!!.
3. Women who don't expect us to be mind readers. They don't want silicon goddesses, or size- zero babes with the sex appeal of stick insects. But they wish women could be more direct in communicating. They must specify if they just want to be listened to or they seek advice. Tell us what's wrong... or what you want and don't rely on telepathy to do it. Also, don't drag other issues into an argument... stick to the problem at hand.
4. A girl who can read our minds. When were men ever fair? They may not want to read a woman's mind, but they do want women to read what's on theirs.
Even if it means that they end up sounding a little like women. A woman with great telepathic skills - that's what they want. Yes, a woman who can guess what's on my mind would be great. We too want to be showered with compliments - not daily, but say once a month.
5. Maturity . Women grow up faster than men, experts say.
But men feel women should be more mature. They all seem to be giggly girls trapped in women's bodies. But if they are so mature, why don't they know how to react when a man is angry? Men want to play the angry young man and be left alone at times.
6. S. E. X. All things in life for a man revolve around the three- letter- word.
We agree that men can't think beyond their pants. They think about it 25 hours a day. It is on top of every man's mind, heart, body and soul.
They also would love to have good- looking girls at their workplace. There should be some eye- candy, especially in our team, so that we have someone to talk about while having a smoke.
7. S- P- A- C- E. It is sacred for them. They need it and crave for it badly. We need a room of our own, where we can lock ourselves up and not be bothered even if the world falls apart. It would be a dream- cometrue for a man to find a woman, who gives them that space.
8. Drink without snobbery.
Chuck taking in the aroma of wines and Scotch - this snobbery won't lead you anywhere. We sometimes drink just to get sloshed, rather than enjoy the oaky smell of Scotch. Yes, even if wine snobbery is a great way to impress women.
9. A job that pays us to go on vacation. All of them seem to be big on adventure sport, even if they chicken out on a roller coaster ride.
Trekking trips and adventure treks, all paid for.
Besides, providing that much- needed thrill in a man's life, they give us the break we want from the saas- bahu soap operas. On screen and sometimes in real life.
10. Night out with the guys. At least once week, a stag night- out because they don't want their world to always revolve around the women in their lives. Guys can have great fun together and that too with no strings attached.
11. Shopping is a pain at times.
It's boring if you have to stay in one single shop for hours. It is quite painful when your mother/ sister/ wife/ girlfriend cannot decide on what she wants to buy.
12. To be the life of a party. So what if they can't move their bodies like Michael Jackson or a John Travolta. So what if they are good only at a bad bhangra or a saphera dance? Your man loves the idea of grabbing all the attention at a party and is proud of his dance moves even if they make you wince. Sure, women love to attract attention at a party too, but they are a little more mature about it... ahem!
13. To be the alpha male at work/ home. We evolved from apes. Call it animal instincts but men crave to be the alpha male, especially at work, with bosses scared of them and women co- workers swooning all over them. And getting paid for even insubstantial work.
14. Condoms. A super- saver, mega economy pack of condoms.
It is a terrible idea to scout for condoms in the middle of the night. A lifetime supply of condoms wouldn't be bad at all.
15. Jacuzzi + Sauna. A luxurious bath in a jacuzzi, a glass of beer and a sexy woman at one's side. Really, did women say that they like to spend hours by themselves in the bath? Maybe something can be worked out.
16. To be treated like babies.
We are always pampering the women in our life. Except our mother, no one else pampers us that much. Sometimes we also want to be the baby in the relationship.
17. Sunday afternoon drinking.
A glass of chilled vodka with lime cordial would make for a perfect Sunday afternoon. Of course one shouldn't be howled at for doing the same. We just want to relax on a Sunday afternoon.
18. Easy hair removal procedures . Not having to get up each morning and shave. Yes, men do discuss hair removal creams and waxing. I am a hairy man. But instead of worrying about ways to get rid of body hair, I wish women would be more appreciative of out natural fur coat.
If Julia Roberts could show off her hairy armpits, why can't men?
19. Buffer stock of boxer shorts and underwears. The last thing men want to do is to shop for underwear.
It's boring. So a never- ending supply of boxer shorts would work for me.
20. Party every month . They want one big party a month without worrying about dropping drunk friends home or cleaning up the vomit on the carpet.
21. To be street smart. Whether they are street smart or not, men want to be known for their streetsmartness.
People should get the impression that we have the solution for everything.
22. Gizmos, gadgets, mean machines. A car that would make heads turn. A smart phone with unlimited data connection, GPS and turn- by- turn navigation ( men don't like asking for directions) along with an organiser and reminders that can jolt you from slumber. A giant screen high definition TV and hi- fi music system with digital data connection. Of course everything should be affordable.
23. An excellent couch. Remember Joey and Chandler in Friends ? How they spent hours sitting on their lazy boy chairs drinking beer and watching Baywatch ? Well, it seems to be a man's ultimate fantasy to have a multi- purpose comfortable couch on which they can do all sorts of things.
24. People who drive in their lanes. What does it take to get some traffic sense into some people?. They want people to drive in their lanes and obviously non- bumpy roads with no traffic. And yes, the traffic cops should treat us like royalty.
25. No alarm clocks. We are lazy, they admit. Alarm clocks should be completely banned. And women - mothers, sisters, wives should understand the importance of five more minutes of sleep.
26. Food, food, food and more food.
True, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. We don't expect our better-halves to cook like our mothers, all we want is for them to learn the basics of good cooking and we are ready to help them in the kitchen.
27. Dhishoom dhishoom. They want to be able to pick up a guy and throw him like a soft ball, and impress the audience.
One must learn to defend oneself, take up krav maga maybe.
28. A surprise bonus/ promotion/ hike. Once in a while, men would look forward to some surprise perks. Recession is over... so there's no excuse, they say.
29. No bills. They don't want to be bothered with bills. Once in a while, banks could waive off credit cards, bills and EMIs. We'll pay our utility bills, though
30. Corrupt politicians caught in sting operation. Men like talking about big things like politics and governance. We love watching politician caught in a sting operation. Well, a man can always dream...can't he!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)